Get out your To-Do lists people because it’s the most wonderful time of the year, the “Holidays!” According to my Google search, the definition of “Holiday” is “a day of festivity or recreation when no work is done.” (Insert emoji laughing hysterically) Now I don’t know about you, but this is definitely NOT the season of rest and play in my little world. T’is the season of WORK! The planning, the parties, the decorating, the dinner making, the cookie baking, the card sending, the good deed doing, the Elf moving, the classroom craft making, the gifts – ohhhhh the gifts. The brainstorming of ideas, the shopping for, the wrapping, the delivering….. I could go on. Don’t get me wrong. I looove me some Christmas time but by the end of December I have lost my damn mind. Meerium-Webster needs to check herself because it’s not exactly possible to have a Holiday where “no work is done” but wouldn’t it be great to have one where less work is done? Of course it would! But how you might ask? By saying one simple word- NO!
Why is this word so hard for us to say? Especially for us women who’ve grown up in a society that tells us to smile, always be kind and never hurt anyone else’s feelings. But what about our own feelings? Shouldn’t those matter most?! Somewhere along the way we forgot. The majority of us would rather agree to do something we really don’t feel like doing or don’t have enough time for in order to avoid a disappointed look on someone’s face or feeling those few moments of awkward or anxiety. So instead we choose to extend our discomfort, wasting precious time and energy cursing whatever it is we agreed to do and stress ourselves silly when we could be watching Hallmark movies with a mug of hot cocoa instead. Whyyyyy though??? This has to stop.
We need to remember that we always have a choice. We can put ourselves first. We can choose to be honest with ourselves and other people, despite the momentary discomfort. Our time and energy is precious and that should be our top priority. Not other people’s opinions, feelings, wants or needs. With every no we say we practice making this choice. And the more we practice the better we get at saying YES to ourselves and the things that matter to us.
I dare you to say no to something this season and practice saying yes to you. Because honestly, someone else won’t get the memo and that craft will get done, the party will be hosted and the cookies will be baked. And you won’t deprive people of the joy they receive when they open that Holiday card because they’ll still be getting them from someone else. Give yourself some time off this go around. Take back your Holidays!
“What other people think of you is none of your business.”
For inspiration:
The Life Coach School Podcast
Episode #63 – Boundaries 2.0

